Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Co-parenting: Disagreements

As a co-parent team, you and your ex will likely disagree over certain issues. Try to keep the following in mind as you work towards finding a compromise with your ex.

Respect.
Be considerate and practice simple manners. This includes letting your ex know about school events, being flexible about your schedule when possible, and taking his or her opinion seriously.

Keep talking.
If you disagree about something important, it is crucial to keep open communication about the topic. Do not discuss your opinions in front of or with your child. If you are still unable to find an agreement, you may need to talk to a third party, like a therapist or mediator.

Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Keep the discussion going if you find yourselves disagreeing about important issues like medical care or school of choice for your child. If you want your child in bed by 7:30 and your ex says 8:00, try to let it go and save your energy for the bigger issues.

Compromise.
You will need to exercise being open to your ex’s point of view, as often as he or she is open to yours. It may not always be your first choice, but compromise allows you both to “win” and may open the door for more flexibility in the future.



Posted by Isa Salvador, LCSW, IMH-E(III)